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Cary Hayward

Counsellor, Couples & FamilyTherapist, Coach, Supervisor

I love working with people to help them to make positive changes in their lives and relationships. I have extensive experience in counselling having been the Clinical Director and National Practice Manager for New Zealand's largest counselling agency (30,000 clients a year) for 10 years.
Cary Hayward counsellor wellington

Contact Cary

Note: I am currently full.
M.  027 221 6871
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Practice Locations

9 The Layline
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Level 6
85 The Terrace
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Transport and Parking

Off street parking available at Whitby location. 
CBD - close to bus and train.


Flexible appointment times are available.


$150 plus GST ($172.50)

Payment Options

Cash, cheque, internet banking.

Client Types

Adolescents, adults, couples, families, groups.


Areas of Special Interest

Couple relationship issues, separation, work issues, family relationships, anxiety, depression, stress, PTSD, grief, loss, life changes, life blocks, sexuality, life meaning, life goals, personal development, mindfulness, spirituality.


Counselling/Therapy Services

Couples Therapy
I work with an evidence based approach called Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) with couples. EFT is a very effective couples approach that focuses on our patterns of connection and disconnection. Once we can understand these patterns we can start to get beyond the dramas that get in the way, and to get to the places we want to be with one another. EFT helps us to move away from moments of disconnection, frustration or despair and to find our way to moments of satisfaction, connection, hope and love. 

Family Therapy
I will work with you and your family to address family issues and get on track with each other.

Personal Counselling 
I will work collaboratively with you to explore, clarify and become more conscious of the issues you are wanting to address, and I will assist you to do what you need to do to get to you where you want to be. My specific approach to a piece of work will depend on a number of factors and I will draw on a wide range of counselling approaches and 20 years of experience to find ways of working that best fit with you and the issues we are addressing. 

A focused process to assist you in achieving specific personal or life goals.


Counselling/Therapy Approach

Overall through my work I have observed how central relationships are to our identity and our way of being in the world. Our core beliefs, thoughts, feelings, self esteem, identity, inner conflicts, outer obstacles and of course ways of relating all arise within a field of relationships. Exploring mindfully the relationships between the different parts of ourselves, or the relationships between ourselves and others, creates opportunities for new understandings and new ways of being to emerge. Creative new solutions can be found, new resources discovered, and new potentials realised. 

I can see you in the Wellington CBD, and also have rooms in a beautiful spot in Whitby with inspiring views of the Pauatahanui Inlet and Hills.


Registrations and Professional Memberships

  • Member of the NZ Association of Counsellors (MNZAC)
  • Member of The International Centre for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Therapy (ICEEFT)
  • Associate Member of The Australia New Zealand Psychodrama Association (ANZPA)


  • Diploma Psychotherapy 
  • Bachelor of Psychology 
  • Post Graduate Diploma Education

Background and Experience

I have been the Clinical Director and National Practice Manager for New Zealand's largest counselling agency Relationships Aotearoa (200 staff and 30,000 clients a year) for 10 years. I have led the initial development of Emotionally Focused Therapy in New Zealand by bringing Dr Rebecca Jorgensen to New Zealand from 2008 to 2014. Over this time I organised and hosted trainings to over 260 counsellors from NZ, Australia and the US. Prior to this I led a national Bachelor of Counselling programme that trained hundreds of counsellor across New Zealand.


Supervision Services

I provide clinical supervision, coaching and mentoring to counsellors, practitioners and students.