Cari Frances (Batenburg)

(she/her/ia) [ Pākehā, Ngāi Te Rangi, Ngāti Raukawa]

It can be really difficult to open yourself up to another person and share your deepest concerns, fears and issues.

It takes a lot of courage to make yourself vulnerable in this way; trusting another person with your ‘stuff’ can feel deeply uncomfortable and risky. No matter why you have come to therapy or what you may share during each session, my role is to try to help – not to judge and not to pathologise you or your experiences.

I work with individuals, couples, multiple-partner/polyamory/ethical non-monogamous relationships, situationships, and other relational romantic or sexual arrangements and communities. I also work with affair partners (‘the other person’) who are struggling to make sense of any of the above as well. The other main focus of my work is with people bereaved by suicide, and other forms of grief and loss.

My Approach

Life isn’t linear, nor is it possible to bring it under our control. I understand that anyone engaging in the counselling and therapy process is living their life at the same time as trying to work on their life. This can create unexpected challenges that demand immediate attention, and so I try to maintain a flexible approach at all times.

If we need to reprioritise the focus of our work to attend to something more pressing that has come up – that’s just how life is and we can roll with it as need be.

My overall approach is largely informed by the non-pathologising perspectives and practices of Narrative Therapy (NT), Acceptance & Commitment Therapy (ACT), Positive Psychology, and Emotion Focused Therapy (EFT). I also draw on Neuroscience, Attachment & Developmental theoretical models and processes throughout my work with individuals and relationship clients.

Contact

The best way to contact me is by filling in the form on this page, or by txt. I will get back to you as soon as possible to make an appointment. If, for the sake of privacy or safety, you would prefer to have your appointment arranged via email rather than by txt or phone call, please let me know that in your message.

Special Areas of Interest

• Bereavement by Suicide
• Couples / Relationship therapy (including ENM, CNM)
• Discernment Therapy (helping couples ‘on-the-brink’ to discern whether to stay, split up or dig in and commit to couples/relationship therapy)
• Chronic Illness / adjusting to long-term or permanent changes in physical or cognitive function
• Confidence & Self-Esteem / Social Anxiety / Shame
• Death & Dying / Grief & Loss
• Divorce / Separation
• Life, Role, Identity Changes – that are causing stress, anxiety, frustration, grief, loss, confusion, or anger
• Palliative Care / Terminal Illness / Diagnosis support, support for caregivers
• Pet Loss Grief – often minimised and poorly understood by others
• Relationship challenges
• Workplace challenges

Qualifications

• Bachelor of Health Sciences (Counselling) – AUT
• Graduate Diploma in Health Sciences – AUT
• Diploma in Arts – Massey University
• Diploma in Business Studies – Massey University
• Certificate of Proficiency in NZSL (New Zealand Sign Language) – AUT
• Poupou Huia Te Reo & Poupou Huia Te Reo Te Hōkairangi (Te Reo Māori) – Te Wananga o Raukawa
• Certified Counsellor of Online & Phone Counselling – CT (UK) 
• Certified Grief Informed Professional (CGP)
• Trained in the Developmental Model of Relationship Therapy